STD’s don’t happen to people like you or me…. do they?
Ok, it’s time that people in the developed world wised up. In the 1980’s we developed a binary paranoia, one about HIV/AIDS, it was one that insisted that it was everywhere, but at the same time only really a threat to the degenrate. The 1980’s were so so free and accepting as perhaps we remember them, they were times of extreme predjudice, especially to the LBGT community, they were commonly held to be degenrate, not different.
1990’s allowed us to become really really lax, medicines for HIV/AIDS were improving and the mortality rates were not so great as they were in the prior decade. People in the developed world began to see HIV/AIDS as something that happened to other people, groupie infested rockstars, smackheads,black africans, famine victims, sex workers and generally people who they do not know.
The media has played it part, we never see the faces of HIV/AIDS in the west the mediacted and visually fine victims they only show us the extreme, which distances the diease from our consciousness. It’s only ever a bad thing. People begin to think ” well it’s mainly an African/black/gay/poor/promiscious thing thus it will never touch me” that is the mindset of someone who is at high risk. that is the mindset of a person who will not think to use a condom. they think the diease resides only within certain people , and catagories. they are not likely to get a screening for STD’s thus they are likely to pass them on to more and more partners.
Now i like many other love sex, i do not advocate abstience because i just don’t believe it’s healthy, but practising unsafe sex is just as dangerous. Certain people watch the news and see thining black people in africa suffering and they use that image to isolate STD’s, they reason it’s something that will cause you to be emaciated immediately and give up the ghost and die, not the case, otherwise healthy people would not have sex with infected people, they would be able to see and thus avoid infection.
I remember in 2006/7 the small English seaside town of St Ives was found to be at the centre of a clustre outbreak of HIV/AIDS. the news reporters went into the town and interviewed the towns people. They all expressed shock, they did not expect it to be in a place like their town. They did not have any foreigners (shock horror, quelle suprise!) everyone was absolutely flabbergastered! this quintisentially English 100% white anglo-saxon place “with no foreigners” had been the epi-centre of an infection cluster of HIV/AIDS so big that that the media had been alerted to raise awareness and ask that people please be tested!
So my basic point is, never feel that you are too nice, or too middle class, too white, black, asian,hetrosexual, traditional,christian,jewish, muslim, hindu, buddist,rasta, or any other religious faith to be struck down…. we are all born of man and woman and have the same equipment, there is no man made catagory that will protect you if you are not using a condom.
Oh and by the way if you come across some person who has HIV/AIDS do not respond with ignorance, that person is still human, do not discriminate, there is the chance that they have not done anything to cause their ailment, you can be born with HIV/AIDS vaginal births with HIV/AIDS can be a transmission risk, brestfeeding with HIV/AIDS is also a transmission risk, some people were unwittingly infected by tainted blood transfusions in the 1980’s and early 90’s. So they may have come into this world and developed HIV/AIDS through no fault of their own. Even if they did Get HIV/AIDS and they should have know better (ie used condom, barrier methods, used clean needles) then still do not discriminate.
The men who spoil things for others!
Today i had the intense displeasure of sharing a journey with 3/4 men who were returning from a stag weekend. they filled me (and i imagine the attractive woman they started to harass) with rage.
It’s a sunday, i a have had only 3 hours sleep after a late night. returning home from london on what shoul have been a quick and comfortable 25 minute trip. Our train company has clean and efficient trains. but due to the loud behaviour of the men i felt sick to the stomach.
i arrived on the train five minutes prior to departure and sat down in the comfy chair. Then exactly as the train doors closed and the final whistle was sounded these louts had just managed to scramble aboard. they sat adjecent to the attractive woman and myself. she was eating smoked salmon and an edame bean salad. i was attempting to discreetly make a phone call to my mother. when the chat started up at high volume.
” so i’m for it when i get home” the men roared loudly while swiging from a shared bottle (unspecified energy drink). ” she is gonna come with the whole that is our babies inheritance, what if you lose your job….blah blah. humourless bitch” alll the men roared with laughter in approval. All i could think was WAIT THIS IGNORAMUS HAS A BABY TO TAKE CARE OF AND HE BLEW £400 ON A NIGHT OUT!!!! THERE IS A RECESSION DAMN FUCKING RIGHT HE IS FOR IT WHEN HE GETS HOME.
Oh but it gets worse he divulged that £300 of that £400 pounds of the savings for the baby , was spent on a private dance from a stripper. “best blowjob i ever had!!!” they all laughed. All i could see in my mind was this image of a woman holding her baby in tears.She must be the brains of the relationship, she has just had a baby, the econmy is sliding down shit creek into the cess pool and my man thinks that he can still spend £400 of rainy day money on getting some anonamous stripper to suck him off. Not to mention they now have a baby to take care of. If they were just a couple with no kids by all means knock yourself out truth would out and she could leave him at the side of the road….. when you have a child things change overnight. Chances are she is still on maternity leave and economically challenged. That baby is still related to horse shit daddy for better or worse. she could take the child and move back to her family but that is not always viable.
I felt the tears inside me, i did not physically manifest them but i felt them. they then moved the conversation to the attractive woman sitting opposite to me . “i like blondes, especially ones with nice tits, they are even better when they wear blue.” they started sniggering and the poor woman went as red as a beet. another one took up the thread ” you know why i like blonde women… you can always tell when they are turned on… they get all flushed in the face and on their chests.” the woman dropped her spoon into her edame beans and her face was immeadiately lowered. i stopped looking at her. we had looked at each other during the previous conversation and shook our heads and and even guffawed at the outrageous behaviour of these louts.
Another one of then men started up with a story to graphic for me to attempt to tell. to cut the story short and sanitise it, him and another guy who was at the time still asleep in the hotel in london. had taken a stripper back to their room, completed a few unsavoury sexual acts and then pissed all over the woman. they took delight in the fact that they hadn’t asked her if it was ok. “The look on her face was classic…. (laughing too hard )……… she went (gasp) and she looked like one of those blow up dolls (mouth gaping open in mock disgust)……(laughing again)…. (bangs fist on table) then i told her to get out and pete gave her some money for a taxi and shut the door on her.” I looked at the seats behind the men and saw a very angry looking dad and his young daughter. he had stuffed his i-pod into the childs ears and she was merrily crayoning away. his face was so red i thought he might punch one of them.
The men continued with their behaviour and they clearly still drunk, smelling of alcohol at 12.30pm going home to their wives. they carried on with this tawdry talk for the whole duration of the journey. Without a thought to the fact that families were travelling with their young children, i imagine a few curious question will be asked ie ” whats a blow job?” “whats spunk?” “whats a gangfuck?”" whats double penetration?” ” what is a cunt?” “why does that man call his wife a bitch?”. But here is what was really damning….. Not one of us disgusted passengers thought it was safe to cahllenge the louts. Too often we see good samaritans and have a go heroes being killed for doing the right thing. so we choose to tolerate them. i have to tell you it is not a nice choice. it not one that leaves us with dignity.
SO HERE IS THE POINT OF MY POINT, IF YOU ARE A WOMAN CALLED JANE, YOU HAVE NEW BABY, YOUR PARNTNER IS IMMATURE WHITE MALE 20′S/30′S, WENT TO A STAG WEEKEND/NIGHT 20TH/21ST FEBRUARY, CAME BACK SMELLING OF JACK DANIELS , HE HAS A CANDIAN FRIEND AND YOU HAVE A JOINT ACCOUNT, YOU LIVE IN THE SOUTH EAST OF ENGLAND, OR EAST MIDLANDS…….
CHECK YOUR BANK TOMORROW MORNING FIRST THING, YOU DESERVE MORE AND BETTER THAN THIS ARSEHOLE. MAKE YOUR OWN PLANS, WHATEVER THEY ARE I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST.
SOME MEN MAKE ME SAD SOMETIMES, EVEN THE ONES I DON’T KNOW AND SHOULDN’T MATTER TO ME.
Am i and the west hypocritical??
Hello again! I began to think today on my previous posts. i began reviewing them. one of them was on the topic of Female Genital Mutilation. I began on my soapbox about how it was wrong, how it could not be sanctioned and was not sanctioned by any religion or deity. How it was evil to tear through the flesh of our daughters for what was little more than vanity that could cripple the woman in childbirth.
Then i began to think, well do i condemn western women who have labioplasty to “neaten” up their labia? I haven’t but i will now have to! these women have healthy labia but feel that the look of their labia is now attractive so they go to a surgeon and slice through their inner labia. Is that not similar to a mild version of FGM? it is not as terrible as the forth variation of FGM which removes pubic fat , outer labia, inner labia, including the clitoris and then the crude sewing of the wound shut leaving only a tiny hole about the width of 5mm across and 5mm high for menstuation and urine. but it is not similiar? people have argued with some sucess that men are the agents driving FGM, some requesting it a prerequiste to marriage. Now i can only wonder , why is it that women in the west are also slicing up their genitals? because of our enduring love of pornography, men have an idelised view of what female genitalia look like, men are very fussy and reject anything that does not fit. so with nervous anxiety women who do not fit the mould rush out and seek to correct this imperfection. It saddens me.
If you have a healthy fully functioning labia, leave it be, if it’s not cancerous, don’t cut it, it is that way for a reason. if a man rejects you because of your labia he is rejecting himself. most men have a complex about their own genitalia, and most women are kind enough not to persecute men about it. If a man has a preconcieved idea about what female genitalia is let him look for that genitalia, you are a woman, not just a piece of pussy, not just a cunt, more than punani. if a man looks for a partner for just her genitalia he will be lonely, we are all blessed to be different.
heavens help if he find a labia to his liking what of that woman, what if he dislikes her nose, or her feet, will she even consider him? bowing to this pressure is bad for women and i cannot condone it no matter wher you have to live or what culture you hold dear.
When your friends are right wing fascists???
Thanks to the joy of www.facebook.com i have had the joy of hooking up with friends who have drifted from me. People who i loved and supported from 1997-2001-2003. Yound adolescent girls have an instrigic desire to form strong bonds of friendship with other females in their age group i was no different. I was a little bit more outsopken and honest but i was no different. The wonderful thing about youth is that we are so open, young minds are beautiful and we express all our sentiments without being bogged down by the weight of political correctness (percieved) or social norms, we called it as we saw it.
So hooking back up with my best gal pal from 1997-2000 lets call her ellena. Ellena was beautiful, still is tall lean with beautiful chocolate brown hair ( back then she dyed it sunshine gold because she presumed it made her sexier). She came from a home somewhat like my own, two parents , happy. the difference was she had twin brothers and i was at the time an only child, oh and i’m black and she is white. But we were so close and loving. she was quite conservative and in a way quite naive about the outside world, she was compared to me sealed in a hermatically sealed bubble of Ellena land.
I could see a world beyond my boundaries, i could emapthise with people who did not share my world view and she could not. Case study our differing views on the murder of Stephen Lawrence. (for those of you not in the know allow me to explain. In 1993 Stephen and his pal got off a bus on the way home , they were surrounded by 5 white men all of whom were known to the police. and slaughtered. when the police arrived instead of aiding stephen as he lay dying, they interogated his friend, ignoring the injured stephen and asked if they were carrying drugs if they had any enermies. stephen died. in the resulting inquiries they interogated his parents was he in a gang? Did he take drugs? and all kind of nonsense. The men were broght to trial but they were aquitted beacause the evidence that the police collected was too scant, Two of the males fathers was fairly close to the police officer in command, the evidence was tainted because it had been gathered with the assumption that the victim was guilty of something and not innocent. By the time the five men were brought to trial and aquitted a tape surfacced in the press that showed the five white males posing with knives and saying how they would “chop up N!663rs and leave them with stumps and throw them in the ocean and tell them to swim home” the tape was several minutes long and really quite damning in light of what they had done. A second trial was brought against them and yet again they got off! The men laughed as they left the court. A few years later the metropolitan police release the Macpherson report that explained that the police was institutionally racist and because of this the case was processed and handled incorrectly. It was an absolute revelation the police has come on leaps and bound in reforming itself. It has increased its intake of people from ethnic minorites and is striving to pull itself away from its racist past.)
It was at this time a little while after the macpherson report that Ellena became very upset. “well it’s all very fine and good. When white people die it doesn’t get this much attention, it’s like we don’t matter.” she said putting her hands under the handdrier. I was baffled she was not the brightest girl but surely she was not stupid? i explained that yes white people matter as well but Stephen Lawrence was something very different, he died because instead of the police woman on the scene trying to stem the bleeding or attempt to revive him or call to check if the ambulance was on it’s way she was interogating a witness like a suspect. she did not check his pulse or try and communicate with him. i tried to reason with her the police officer in command did not step aside when he realised his prior connections with two of the suspects. The interviews with the Parents of Stephen Lawrence were more akin to interogations than interviews.In one instance questioning brought Mrs Lawrence to tears by it’s heartlessness. Ellena’s responce? So the police were doing their job, what was he doing out at that time of night anyway he could have been doing something dodgy? well i’ll be i thought to myself. If Stephen was white , would his friend have been interogated ? would the Police Woman have attended to him and his injuries (surely a live victim is better at talking than a dead one?), would the police officer in command have stood aside? would the evidence have been collected properely and without the assupmtion that Stephen had sone something? would those five white men have passed him by if he and his friend been white? Ellena had her mind made up it was media circus over nothing. i had to disagree because of Macpherson the police had to reform itself and i felt that i could begin to hope that my community would be treated with something that resembled fairness.
So i let it lie, I could not win all the time! she was beautiful but naive and i was brainy and worldly. then she went to Austrailia and came back everything was Paki this and Paki that. I asked her not to use that work because it was offensive and she countered that everyone in Austrailia said it and it was not swearing, it was just an shorter form of Pakistani. I countered that she should know better and that all that Aussie sun must have burned her brain out, She knew it was offensive that is why she did not use it before she went to Australia, she used Asian for short and Pakistani in all other situations. We grew up in the late 80’s early 90’s when “paki-bashing” was all the rage with neo-nazi scum in this country. she could not miss it her Area was closer than mine to a Pakistani stronghold in town. Sometimes i wanted to strangle her she was so ignorant.
Ellena had a secret that we shared , her grandfather was German and she was so worried about that, i had a feeling that she might have been entirely anti-immigrant had it not been for her German granddad. she cried in history class when a teacher picked up on her anglicised german name. It is name that almost english but it’s sound points you to holland and Germany. It was a lesson on Nazi’s and she left the room red faced and within 5 seconds of reaching the toilets she was collasped on the ground sobbing , she bore some guilt unnessarily her grandfather had left germany in the 1930’s although he wasn’t a jewish man. but the weight of other people’s assumptions crushed her so i let my 5′11 cry on my 5′0 shoulder. It’s so stupid but it was moments like this i felt like yelling, see the world isn’t clear cut and you need to look at things from another perspective! but it would do me no good
So when we linked up on facebook how not surprised was i to find that she is married to a guy in the forces. Bless she was always patriotic, but then so was i i just did it in a way that i considered not blind to the rest of the world. she sent me a link to join a facebook group after Prince harry’s “paki-towelhead gate” furore and it said “support Prince Harry” and i pressed the ignore button. Because there is not a “FUCK OFF” button. we were talking the other day jsut reminising over old times when we started chatting about the economy she reasoned the reason that we are all in such strife is that we have too many foreigners taking all the plum jobs and sucking benefits. “if you cannot prove that your roots are 100% here in the uk you should just resettle in the land of origin and that way at least we can get our balance back” i shook my head and i pondered if i argued with her would i be the big bad scary black woman who made that poor sensitive white woman cry? i decided yes i would being playing into her hands, so i took the gentle approach. “you know at least 25% of you belongs in Germany , are you going to remove a leg or an arm?” she blushed and i think she finally understood what i had been trying to drive home to her all these years.
Social class and how your racism is percieved
February 27, 2009 at 12:45 pm (black people, britain, ignorance, media, men, misery, news corperations, politics, the world, women) (abuse, black people, education, gross stupidity, hatred, Injustice, literary comment, media, racism, sexism, stupidity, violence)
Hi, i’m on the warpath again over Britain and it’s hypocracy. i was just reading “The Times” friday 27th february when i come to page 9. to break down the story it is about students at Oxford university. They have a student paper, the latest edition has some old school racism thrown in along with other personally libelous material, they used pornographic images and superimposed the faces of students and staff. It uses obsence sexual slurs and alludes to child abuse and zoophilia it just seems over the top. the phrases included are
“should be shipped off to Guantanamo bay and shot”
“Can’t they just stay in their own communities? They have sex with monkeys, don’t they ? We can’t have stuff like that in a white upper class male commune like Cherwell”
well apart from making apparently amusing references to the holocaust and refering to black people using racial slurs. All this is pardoned with the simple excuse that it is all Satirical, just satire. well lets just ask what the hell are the satirising? apparently another publication called the “cornmarket busker”.
lets just take a look at the definition of the word satire, from my book, called “The Synonym Finder” by J.I.Rodale. 1971.
Satire, n. 1burlesque, parody, travesty, mocking exaggeration, caricature, cartoon, political cartoon, lampoon, spoof, pasquinade, squib, takeoff, inf. put down; cut ,jibe,fleer,slur.
Now what is so AMAZING that they can excuse printing pornography, and slandering people. that is not satire, it’s just bloody lazy. If “The Times” attempeted something like that and tried to use the transparent excuse of satire they would be raked over the coals and lose readership and despite having an army of lawyers probably lose.
You see i can see these incredibly talented and intellent students getting away with their offensive little prank on the ground that they are intelligent. It will be argued that really , you are offended because you do not understand, because really what they did was something amazingly clever that has flown over the average laypersons head. WE the general public, acknowledging that these people are probably imensely clever feel cowed by that sort of arguement and accept it, albeit very grudgingly.
Compare and contrast with the treatment of Jade Goody and Danielle lloyd and Jo from S Club 7. in 2007 they ganged up and shamelessly bullied Bollywood star Shilpa shetty, it took a slight racial tinge, they used the phrase “poppadom” and “go home” (thanks danielle!) towards Miss Shetty and they were vilified. Jade goody’s reputation was in tatters, Danielle Lloyd lost several modelling contracts and jo lost her business and had a mental breakdown. All of these women could all be described as solidly working class. They are not the brightests by their own admission. But what floors me is that the students at Oxford have done something five/six times worse than what these three women did but non will feel any consequence because they come from a certain class and thus are fairly insulated.
The front page of the students “satire” is to all intents and purposes a child sex story. that could be used by paedophiles to stimulate themselves. the sexual abuse and then murder of two babies at the hands of two students. well i guess it’s too clever for me to understand huh?
It reminds me of when that stupid daughter of a cuntface Carol Thatcher thought that it was acceptable to call a tennis player a Gollywog, then when Adrain Chiles reprimanded her she corrected herself and said “half gollywog then” (well he is mixed race). then she came out blaming everyone but herself. she did not even acknowledge that the racial term Gollywog was extremely offensive. she just kept on complaining that she was having a private conversation. i say fuck you Thatcher!
Thatcher is insulated by her class, if it was jo brand who had used Gollywog people would have been up in arms about how she should know better, and that there is no place for that kind of language in this day and age. but Thatcher is the Ex-prime minister’s daughter so somehow she is beyond reproach.
So all in all, if you are wealthy and educated you can be mildly racist and get away with it and claim it’s satire or simply out of context and people will take you at your word , you can get on with the rest of your life and it’s all hunky dory.
However if you are poor or only averagly educated somehow you must know know better, you are held to a stricter standard. you are not clever and probably don’t know how to spell satirical, but you have to know better than people with all the money and education at their feet.
LIFE STINKS WHEN YOU ARE POOR… NOT ONLY IF YOU ARE RACIST!
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